Thursday, May 25, 2006

Aparigraha


In Yoga, we practice Yamas (restraints) and Niyamas (observances), these are basically rules to help you live your life better and achieve higher spirituality. I try to focus on 1 from each. The niyama that I try to practice is santosha, which is contentment. Because I like to shop too much :) True, shopping is fun, but let's face it, you can't take it with you, which leads me to the yama... Aparigraha, or non-attatchment. This is a hard one. I came face to face with how much I have to learn about this yesterday. We took Bootsie (my sweet little kitty) to the vet. Standard check up of her teeth because she seems to be struggling to eat dry food. She also being on a diet has lost too much weight. Four pounds!!!!! That's alot for a kitty. So the vet said her teeth looked good, but she wanted to take some blood to check everything else.. Ok, how bad could it be, right? I just had blood taken yesterday also... But kitties are different. She tried one arm first, not enough blood, second arm, not enough blood. So the vet says, I'd like to give her oxygen and anestitize her so I can draw blood from her neck, it's the kinder thing to do. I will tell you I didn't flinch, and said, ok, do what you have to do. But I kissed my kitty, told her I loved her so much, and hubby and I left the room. I then preceded to act non too kindly to hubby. Did you know about this?? I asked him (he made the appt for her)... OOOhhhhh not very yogi of me, already... And then the fear.... "she better wake up or I'm going to be really pissed off." Nice, very nice. I'm so very nice to him at this point. Why? because I am paralyzed by fear that something is going to happen to my little girl. Please understand, If you don't have a pet, you probably can't relate, but I've had her for 14 years. I love her. I didn't take a yogi approach to this situation. I totally forgot to breathe. I lashed out at my hubby, my rock, the love of my life. Because I let fear creep in. I forgot that as Buddha says, in the end we are left with only ourselves. We will lose everything. Hard thing to practice, aparigraha. God showed me that yesterday. Lesson learned, I have a long way to go in my practice. Kitty is ok, she was woozie for about an hour. I can't stop kissing her...

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